Published:

02/22/2011 01:39pm

The Twenty Commandments for Living

The Twenty Commandments for Living
By Mila Bernadkin

“Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look
around once in a while, you could miss it.”

~ Ferris Bueller

Life should come with a user’s manual, instructing us step by step on how to live it. Then we’d always know what to expect and what to watch out for. We’d embrace the good things that come our way and prevent the bad things from happening. We’d never make any mistakes, and even if we made some, we’d know how to correct them. We’d always succeed and never fail. If we at least had a handbook with a set of rules and some tips on how not to break them, we’d know what we can and can’t do, should and shouldn’t say. There’d be no hurt, no pain, no problems in the world, and life would be perfect.

Unfortunately, life doesn’t come with a user’s manual or a handbook. There are no instructions, no tips. That’s why we screw up, break the rules, make mistakes, get hurt, and have lots and lots of problems. That’s why we do things we wish we hadn’t and say things we regret later.

Regrettably, there’s no user-friendly machine that can erase everything we’re sorry for or ashamed of, and we can’t press the rewind button so we can go back and start all over again. We can never go back to the way we were.

If we could know where and when we might fall, we’d throw a pillow under our knees right before it happened. If we could know when we were going to die, we’d never keep our calendars clear for that day. Instead, we’d look into other options and make other plans that would keep us far away when death came.

We can never know what’s ahead. Life is unpredictable. It’s like a deck of cards. You never know what cards you’re going to pick or what hand will be dealt. Life deals us cards, and we have to deal back.

We search for things, we look for people. Sometimes they’re useless things and the wrong people, so we start our quest over and try again. We have lots of questions we need answers to. Sometimes we get them, sometimes we don’t. We learn many new things, but there’s always more to learn.

Life is full of surprises—good and bad. Some of us succeed and then fail, others struggle and then get lucky. Sometimes we can build a life, and sometimes we have no control over it. Some live the way they choose to because they can, others live the only way they can because they don’t have a choice.

Life can be easy or tough, sweet or bitter; life can be full or empty, interesting or boring; life can be fun or duty, joy or obligation; life can be happy or miserable, a blessing or a curse. One thing is sure: Life as we live it is not black and white—it’s mostly grey, and it’s up to us to make it more colorful.

We can’t just wait for what we want; we have to go for it and get it. We don’t know how much time we have on this earth. Let’s just make the most of it. Let’s try the best we can to make this time and this experience we call LIFE more meaningful.

I’ve decided to invent my own list of tips and directions to a successful and happy life, based on my own experience and on what I’ve learned from the people around me.

Useful Tips:
If you don’t like the hand you’ve been dealt, deal with it anyway.
If you want the horseshoe to bring you luck, work as hard as a horse.
If you want your relationship to last, compromise.
If you see your life as a piano keyboard (black and white), improvise.

The Twenty Commandments for Living:
1. Accept and embrace life as it comes, but do your best to make it better.
2. Accept and like yourself the way you are, but remember: there’s always room for improvement.
3. Be good to yourself and life will be good to you.
4. Always be yourself and never change just to please somebody. An original of yourself is better than a copy of someone else.
5. Reevaluate your attitude and try