5 Steps To ENHANCE LOVE during Covid
Loving your partner quickly turns ugly if you don’t practice empathy and kindness.
Learning to love someone from a place of deep empathy and kindness is the secret to success!
There are 3 groups of partners who are most affected by COVID-19's forced togetherness:
Are you a couple reveling in 24/7 togetherness because your loving, intimate, and passionate relationship was unshakeable before the virus struck?
Or are you an extremely civil couple in a strained long-term marriage who is sharing the house as housemates do
— coming and going with minimal intimate contact? You may share meals and even share a bed but how much joy and laughter and touch is there?
Perhaps you are an in-between couple who is making do with this challenging situation that puts every relationship under a microscope. Are you pro-active in looking for new ways to improve your relationship?
If you’re in the last group, I’m speaking to you!
Most major cities have reported that dog adoptions have gone up
, up, up since the beginning of COVID-19 but that is NOT what I mean about intimacy! That’s because if you’re looking for unconditional love, pick a dog! Your odds are far greater than with a human companion...UNLESS
However, you aren’t locked into that grim reality that your relationship needs more LOVE.
To learn how to love someone more; the 1st step to receiving more love; here are 5 steps to embrace empathy and kindness in your relationship.
1. Contribute to one another's lives.
How much time do you spend each day thinking about how to make your partner’s life more wonderful?According to Marshall Rosenberg, Ph.D.
, founder of Nonviolent Communication, this is a natural component of love — the desire and commitment to finding ways to contribute to one another.
2. Consider their needs NOW.
Which have been the most effective ways to put a smile on your partner’s
face? Some partners keep doing what they think will work again and again, feeling confused when those strategies fail to work again and again.
Others do what they want someone to do for them — again — that lacks empathy and consideration. It just doesn’t work now or when selecting a Christmas gift!
When we consider the needs of our partner and carefully craft options to please them, the relationship must improve.
3. Don't let resentment build until one of you explodes. Sexplode don't explode!
Passion is one "make it or break it" option for long-term relationships but, first, you need to get the other parts right.Sexual desire
is based in large part on trust and a feeling of safety in a long-term relationship.
While passion for passions’ sake may be enough for a hot weekend, if you’re going to see that person month after month and year after year, you cannot afford to let resentment build or you will find yourself cut off and out in the cold, sexually and emotionally!
4. Solve any finance issue together.
Finances are the other biggest challenge to long-term relationships and particularly, during COVID-19, the financial pressure can either bring you closer together — you two against the world — or it can make one of you leave a sinking ship.
Again, the biggest difference in both groups is not the finances — it's the empathetic connection between the partners, a skill which you must develop in yourself!
5. Create Fun!
Fun is a surprising component to success during COVID-19. Even if fun wasn’t important to you before, when you were busy with work and have many entertainment options, now that's no longer true.
Amazon Prime and Netflix are only entertaining for a while, aren’t they? If you can make your partner laugh
— really, really laugh — you will find that your relationship is safer than the homes, in which there is little laughter.
Ultimately, your ability to empathize — to guess what your partner is feeling and needing and to hear your partner — is a crucial skill.
When you're willing to do so until peace returns and intimacy is recreated, then you've taken a huge step towards lifelong love!
The alternatives — Cold War or divorce — are just too costly and worse during COVID-19 than at any other time.