Published:

09/28/2011 03:47pm

COMMUNICATE WITHOUT BLAME OR SHAME

Jiddu Krishnamurti said "the highest form of intellligence is to observe without judgment".



Judging and evaluating other persons behaviors and actions, will alienate us from them.

In addition, it dehumanizes, disconnects and disassociates us from others.

When someone does or says something that does not make life wonderful for you, describe the behavior or action. This can strengthen the connection between the two of you.



Lets see how -



1. The boss is unpredictable, he is procrastinating around his decision again - Judgment

2. The boss told us he would announce the decision by last week, we still have not heard from him - Observation



Try this one and see if you can make the distinction-



1. You are arguing with me for the fourth time this week- (Observation/Judgment?)

2. This is the fourth time this week that you stated you disagree with what I am saying- (Observation/Judgment?)



This week, strengthen the quality of connection between the two of you and others by making observations.

Ardently and mindfully steer away from making judgments and evaluations. Remember to describe the behavior.

"LABELLING IS DISABLING".



Practice, Practice, Practice.



Knowing the difference between OBSERVING and JUDGING will help you change the way of seeing and change what is seen.



Simply remember NO BLAME NO SHAME!

Upgrade your verbal software!