Emotional Mastery: Set Empowering Goals and Ditch the Expectations!
Our goals say a lot about us– expressing who we are and what we stand for. Empowering goals take us into life where we want to be. They bring us purpose, passion and a sense of accomplishment.
Often, we confuse empowering goals with expectations. A goal is a mission that you set for yourself, and should be based upon your personal values and beliefs. Sometimes, the expectations others have for us about how we should live, who we should be and what we should look like become enmeshed with what we intend for ourselves. When we try to live up to everyone else’s expectations, we lose sight of ourselves. We get disconnected.
Sometimes, we are the ones who set the bar for our goals too high. This is because our own self-expectations are simply unattainable. We all have those “shoulds” and “have-tos” that we struggle to meet each day. Maybe you think you ought to look a certain way… be a certain size… have a certain lifestyle. Basic goal-setting teaches us that an empowering goal is one that is attainable… within reach.
So ditch the expectations and focus on achieving Empowering Goals instead. To help you get started, consider your answers to the following:
* What do you want? Take some time to ponder your thoughts and feelings and get to the bottom of what it is that YOU really, really want. Ask yourself what you choose for your life, what you intend to bring into your life and what you are willing to create.
* Why do you want this? Look at what it is that you want and determine WHY this goal is important to you. Ask yourself what meaning this "thing" brings into your life, what positive feelings may result and the positive contribution it may bring to the people you love.
* When do you want this? Finally, consider when you are willing to accomplish this goal. Are you willing to commit to this goal TODAY? Are you willing to stay the course through it's completion? Place a beginning and an ending time-frame on your goal, to help you to stay motivated.
Here’s a final tip about setting empowering goals. When you are faced with an expectation that doesn’t fit into your value system or align with your goal, simply be aware of it. And ask yourself, what do I aspire to? If you’ve grown lax about keeping up with your goal, forgive yourself! Remind yourself of your empowering goal statement. Then get back up on the horse, and get to realizing your goal and fulfilling your dream!
About the Author: Susan Liddy, benevolence expert for life, body and business, holds a master's degree in counseling psychology. A Professional Certified Life Coach and motivational speaker, Susan is CEO of Aspire Life Coaching, which she founded in 2004. Susan's innovative tools include her online Social Media Sisterhood for businesswomen, "The FEMpreneur Fraternity;" the "Little You" process for personal healing; and Body Benevolence, a system empowering women to improve their confidence, self-esteem and body image. These are based on the Cycle of Empowerment, a proprietary process Susan developed to help women overcome fear and achieve their desired results in life. Learn more by visiting her public websites and blogs: www.SusanLiddy.com, http://www.AspireLIfeCoaching.org, http://SecretsToUltimateLiving.com and http://www.AspiringFEMpreneur.com. Susan can be contacted at SLiddy@AspireLifeCoaching.org.