Published:

10/15/2011 08:22pm

Recovery for Bullied Kids: Change Your Mental Software

Your subconscious mind is a bit like a bulldog. It doesn’t want to let go! It likes the familiar and what it knows whether it serves you well or not. It operates on instinct and not logic or reason. You can’t just wish it away. It never sleeps. It takes no breaks or vacations and tends to get its way. While your rational, conscious mind has a new agenda and may want to change, the subconscious is hooked on what has always been and the old way of thinking and doing things. Now you know why it is a challenge to break those old nasty habits, including hanging on to dysfunctional relationships that should end. The subconscious has more history and the strength and energy of emotion. By understanding how the mind works and applying neuro-reconditioning techniques, you can program the subconscious to cooperatively support conscious will and the changes you desire.
If you have been bullied and wish to begin your recovery process, here are tools that will help you change from the “insight” out. While insight and awareness are the initial steps to change, a few more steps are usually necessary. For example, you may be aware that you should quit smoking or lose weight, but awareness alone does not make the scale go down.
Goal Setting Is Not Enough
While writing down goals is essential, it simply is not enough. If goals were enough, you would not have the same New Year’s Resolutions year after year after year. Besides awareness, writing down goals and having an understanding of “why” you must change, there also must be a certain level of tension. For example, my former husband finally quit smoking when his physician gave him this choice. “You quit or you die.” He made the right choice and is enjoying life. Why did he not quit sooner? The threat of death was not upon him and thus denial reduced the tension enough so “habit” had its way.
You must first change your mental software. In other words, you need to rewire your brain’s circuitry to change how and what you think. You must reboot your brain and reprogram your mind to no longer be a victim, but to be victorious. It all starts with your belief system. By changing your thoughts and your beliefs, you will overcome the victim syndrome and give yourself the rewards you deserve. There are several methods that will help you acquire a new sense of self and a new way of being. Here are a few psychologically proven methods that will rewire your thinking to become more confidence and self-assured.

In Your Vision of the World Is the Image of Yourself.

Check your self-limiting beliefs which are the cause of self-sabotaging behaviors. Many people have been “programmed” with a mental software that needs to be deleted. You may have been hitting “save as” out of habit and now that habit needs to be broken and moved to “trash.” Your self-image and thoughts are projected 24/7 and send out signals just like your cell phone. If your thoughts are negative, you attract negative people and events into your world to match that inner image. Likewise, if your thoughts are positive, you attract positive people and events that match that belief and expectation.
Write down clear, precise attainable goals related to what you desire and want to change. The act of writing down your goals creates a stronger commitment and thus motivates action. Knowing “why” each goal is important to you accelerates its success. It transforms thoughts into action and dreams into reality.
Note that I said clear, precise and attainable goals. If you have vague goals, you will get vague results, if any at all. If they are not attainable, you may get discouraged and throw in the towel. Take one step at a time and remember that the longest journey begins with the first step, a step that you must take. Dream big and bold, but be patient.
Change your mental software to reboot your brain and reprogram your mind for success. Neuroscience has introduced mind-changing methods such as affirmations and visualization that will give you a new beginning.
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